I’m a self confessed ‘Googler’. Most of the time i search for answers on the Internet and find the most extreme outcome. Definitely not healthy for a catastrophiser. And when you become a parent you catastrophise about the health and wellbeing of your offspring as well as your own.
Talking as a former babyphobe, posts about parenthood are generally boring at best, nauseating at most. But if feel i need to rant this one out for the sake of my own sanity as well as for other new parents out there.
I have been scared into believing that if i don’t follow all the advice out there i’m going to create a monster. I’ve spent the last eight months panicking that i’m going to end up with a child that never sleeps.
You get told a lot of things when you are expecting or the parent of a small child but here’s two things that i did not get told. The first is a warning but i’m hoping that the second will bring some comfort.
Firstly, people joke that you can kiss sleep goodbye, but they don’t explain that this is a byproduct of the battle to get your baby to sleep. Whoever came up with the expression “sleeping like a baby” was the biggest joker of all. Yes all babies are different and not everyone will have this problem, but from personal experience and my trawling of the virtual world of distraught parents; some babies just won’t sleep!
Here’s the second bit of advice, the good news…. sometimes you just have to be patient so stop panicking and just enjoy your child. Trust your instincts and know that you’ve got this . It may feel that your child will never sleep through the night, or you’ll never get that magical three hour nap from them so you can actually get some time to yourself. But it does happen, they will sleep on their own and my eight month old is evidence of that.
So….stop believing everything you read, stop being scaremongered and enjoy those precious moments. Your baby can sleep in your arms sometimes, they can come into your bed and you don’t have to leave them to scream themselves to sleep.
Now i just need to remember my own advice when i reach the next hurdle! Oh, and as this is an art blog, here’s a sketch of my bundle of joy, well rested and fresh from his nap!
I listen to a lot of my friends problems, talking through them and coming up with viable solutions. With my interest in psychoanalysis I can see to some extent where problems stem from therefore helping to understand how to resolve them.
I use the same approach for myself; analysing the roots of my issues and recognising areas for change. Why doesn’t this approach ever seem to get me anywhere though? If I know the root of the problem and the solution, why do I keep going round in circles?
This conundrum has got me thinking about the mental states of similar thinkers. Are all psychoanalysts suffering from the same feeling that their worlds are spinning out of control? And does that mean that they are therefore not in any position to be helping anyone else with their problems?
The only conclusion I can draw from this is the fact that trying to deal with my own problems myself is counterproductive. That exploring personal issues internally, from my own viewpoint is doing me no good whatsoever therefore completely nullifying my attempts to “know oneself.”
Back to square one for me it seems…yet again.